Who doesn't crave that little thrill you get from seeing sudenly message from them pop up on your screen and knowing that they are thinking of you and wanting to connect? So, it's no surprise that when the rate of those messages suddenly slows from a flood to drip, it's really easy to go from perfectly chill to full blown paranoid faster than you can type BRB.
No one could blame you for thinking that, if they're texting you less oftenit must mean wwhen have lost interest. But the good thing is that's not necessarily true.
The fact is, texting itself is an unreliable barometer of interest in a relationship. It can mean everything, but it could dhen as easily mean absolutely nothing.
So, don't assume that because they went from texting you 75 times a day to, say, five, that it's time to go to relationship DEFCON 1. There are totally normal, non-panic-inducing reasons why you're hearing from them less — and really only one to worry about. How can you tell the difference when the sudden silence is loaded and when it's safe not to sweat it? Turns out, the subtext of texting behavior is pretty easy to interpret if you know what to look for.
Maintaining the sheer volume and furious pace of texting of a new romance is just not sustainable long-term. While this early phase can be really exciting, it's OK and normal for things to slow down over time as you get into a natural routine, Brenda Della Casaa relationship coach and author of Cinderella Was A Liartells Elite Daily.
Texting less often during work hours is different than not texting at all during a hour period. So, if texting has slowed over time, ask yourself, are you communicating in other ways? Are they showing you love IRL? If so, then the slowdown in their texting is nothing more than the usual ebb and flow inherent in all areas of a comfortable and secure relationship.
Their Life Got Busier Before you hit the panic button, take x beat. Ask yourself, did they recently mention a big project coming up at work?
Did they get a new job? Is it finals week?
Do they have family in town? Considering how your partner is behaving in other areas of the relationship can help clarify things, as Diana Dorell, intuitive dating coach and author of The Dating Mirror: Trust Again, Love Againtells Elite Daily.
Have they stopped making time to see you and spend time with you? As important as you are to your partner, there will be a time when life gets in the way of texting. These are all totally reasonable reasons why they can't reply as quickly or as eloquently as they have in the past.
Yes, it is possible the lack of texting is an indication that they've lost some of that loving feeling. Perhaps things were getting too serious and they are trying to cool things down, says Della Casa.
Mention that you have noticed a decrease in communication and you're wondering if something is going on that you're not aware of. If they say that everything is fine, this is the time to speak up for what you want.
The key, as the experts say, is that if you're concerned go straight to the source and talk to your partner about how you are feeling. Sometimes, the best solution is the simplest one. This article was originally published on Sep.