about sharing With 13 contributors all trying to become new friends in One Hot Summerour writer Rad talks about how she zpain the experience of making new pals as an adult.
When I turned 28 this year, I looked around at the friends who'd made the effort to come to my birthday. In many ways, it was like the other birthdays that had come before: roughly 20 people were there, a dozen or so had cancelled at the last minute, and a handful of my very closest friends had really gone the extra mile. Such a large of new friends is pretty rare.
But friendships are undeniably important. I only made a handful of friends during my degrees, and embarrassingly, after five years in my old job, there's just one good friend who I still see regularly. And it showed. As lovely as my oldest friends are, we no longer had much in common. I said yes to all invitations for drinks or lunch and, by the end of week one, I found myself in the pub sharing my insecurities with three near-strangers.
That sped our friendship along far quicker than small talk. Within days, I found I had two brand new friends: the then-graphic deer Sarah and fellow writer Natalie. At the start, I knew someone had to make the first move, so as embarrassing as it was, I created a WhatsApp group and initiated our plans.
But after a while, the tables turned. In just 10 months, I've been able to open up to them in a way I never have with other friends. So when I set out on my friends-making mission, I decided to start across the corridor. Chqt and I got on so well that I started knocking on his door whenever I needed neighbourly help.
After a while I decided to repay him by taking him out to dinner. BBC Three My rock-climbing friends Everyone always says the best way to make new friends as an adult is to take up new hobbies. So last summer, I forced myself to do just this.
That was when I met Jamie and Christie. They were both a lot more active than me, but one day we all faked illnesses to have a lie-in and truly bonded. We ed occasionally after that trip, but six months later xex invited me to them on a road trip to the Grand Canyon.
But after an awkward first night in a motel, it became one of my favourite-ever holidays. We spent hours sharing our life stories in the car, laughing non-stop at dinner and bonding over the incredible views on our hikes.
As soon as we got back, we started planning our next road trip. We might not speak every day or even every week, but I treasure my friendship with them.
So when I started becoming friendly with my ex again, after almost a year apart, I decided it would be a good time to pick up my friendship with one of his best mates. James and I had always got on.
Last year, we asked my ex if it would be weird if we hung out alone, and after getting the all-clear, we started going to galleries together, having dinner, and booking theatre tickets. I never expected to make friends like this. And not all of them worked out.
But I found the best way to take things to the next level was to open up. Once I shared my insecurities, they reciprocated, and now we have friendships that are built on much stronger foundations than some of my older ones. More from Gender.